New Site Ideas & Selfshipping!! <3 New Site Ideas & Selfshipping!! <3 Now that I have gotten life updates out of the way, I wanted to share about my new site ideas and some new waifu and husbando news!
Okay.. site updates. I think I have a few.
First and foremost, I wanted to share that I decided I do not want to move or alter this website! While it is true that I love darker aesthetics, too, I just am too attached to this place. What is better, in my opinion, is that I feel like I can just incorporate everything into one place; my cute and girly side, my dark side that loves slashers and dark aesthetics, etc. I feel like that is the most logical decision. I have moved around too many times and I think I am best just staying put. As I said, I am just too attached to this site, anyways. This site feels like a second home to me. :)
I also wanted to announce an idea for a new section. I wanted to make a section of my website based around my experiences with mental health and disability. I even came up with a cute layout idea!! I want to talk all about my experiences with Autism and my other diagnoses. I will probably have sections dedicated to each individually, especially since I have so much to say about each (I have three). I wanted to incorporate a cutesy, pastel design; something akin to Japanese menhera aesthetics since they are super cute and resonate with me. Rest is a surprise!! ;)
I also am **not** going to make a shrine for Stu or his relationship/dynamic with Billy. I have kind of outgrown the fad. While, yes, Stu is sort of a husbando, I just don’t really feel him that much anymore. He’s fun to think about, but I can’t imagine anything serious. He’d just kill me for Billy’s sake or cheat on me lol. Still love him, but just.. Meh. I’m also not that big on the ship anymore. I do like it, but, as I’ve said, I just really don’t like m/m that much. I also don't tend to obsess with canon/canon ships nearly as much as my personal selfships.
I am going to be making some shrines for my current selfships! I have two new characters, lol. I will be sharing below!
So I'm back to my selfshipping shenanigans! ~ Well, I've still been up to it even since I was gone, but I mean I am back to it *here*. I have some good news and also some bad (or bittersweet) news.
I might as well get the good news out of the way! I ship with two new characters and I am so, so in love.
First and foremost, Sidney Prescott! I feel like just *maybe* somebody saw this one coming with my Scream OC. I mean, maybe that whole thing made it obvious that I subconsciously like her lol. Regardless, I'm just head over heels for her.
I just need to gush about Sidney for a moment. I really fell in love with her. The exacts are kind of weird and embarrassing, but, basically, I really discovered my feelings for her after Scream 4. I honestly feel like I already lowkey liked her before then, to be honest (or was at least curious, like, that character I made just to ship with her… c’mon).
When I watched Scream 4, I couldn’t stop thinking about how truly beautiful she was. I especially loved seeing her in that red dress. She genuinely looked so sexy that I couldn't keep my eyes off of her curves. I would sure love to go to her book signing!! She’d have me acting up fr. I also couldn't help but admire her maturity here. I love to see how much she's grown since the first movie; since she's overcome her traumatic past, since she's learned to cope and help others. I find it so admirable and lovely.
Initially, I'd found this 30s version of her to be much more attractive than her younger selves. Don't get me wrong, I still do have a slight preference for 30s Sidney, but I have found myself attracted to her younger versions, too. I've come to find younger Sidney so very cute. I genuinely want to fluster her.
Aside from the previously mentioned qualities, I feel like we would be able to bond and connect over a lot of things. I genuinely feel that we have so much chemistry; from her sexual trauma to her grief over dead mother. I can see myself taking time with her to really make sure she’s comfortable with anything we would end up doing. I feel like she would be much more comfortable with me than Billy, anyways. (That, and I also strongly feel that she was definitely a lesbian in the first movie-probably the second, too. She was def bisexual after that, though. I can go into detail on the shrine.)
Ugh, and she’s a writer, too! I really feel so much love and chemistry between us. She’s so cute when she’s younger, and so graceful and mature when she’s older. I just can’t help myself. I have loved her since September 9th!
I have a commission of her in the works! It's a bit “spicy” so to say, but I still think I'll use it for my shrine. My self insert is also based on gyaru, babyyyyy!! And she is *bad*. B) Let's just say Sidney's helped me discover another side of myself. ;)
Enough rambling about Sidney. I just needed to get it off my chest before I set my shrine up… and, boy, that isn't even all I have to say about her. She's all I've been thinking of lately, but I just have other things I need to talk about, too.
Okay, so, aside from Sidney, I do have another much newer husbando! :) I have just fallen head over heels for Jason Voorhees. I can’t even begin to describe how special he is to me, but I will try my best (I even went on a half an hour tangent to my therapist!). Oh boy. It is such a long story, but the story and husbando are both so very special to me.
It all started in late November and early October. My sister took me to a big Jason Halloween maze. At the time, I hadn’t really cared about him; I’d only seen him in Freddy VS. Jason (my dad raised us on A Nightmare on Elm Street) and just felt.. meh. Anyways, we went to the maze and I was so pissed that he hardly jumpscared me. I basically saw every other person in front in me get jumpscared! I was so pissed. But then I thought about it.. If I didn’t care about Jason, then why did it bother me so much?
So I decided to watch Friday the 13th. Hated the first one (but Pamela is a great slasher, won’t lie) and LOVED Parts 2-4. I am an absolute sucker for the original four movies! I was so into Jason that I was on the edge of my seat just shaking the whole time.
I begged my sister to return. We ended up going through twice!! I wasn’t even scared-not only bc this stuff genuinely doesn’t scare me, but also because I was just so head over my heels in love. One of the Jasons even remembered me and got super duper close me the second time. I have videos, too! I’ll upload them to my upcoming shrine if I can find a way. The whole thing just really amplified my love for Jason.
AND WHAT'S MORE IS THAT I'M TAKING A PLANE TO VEGAS TO GO TO ANOTHER ONE!! ON FRIDAY THE 13TH!! HYPEEEE!
JASON, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!
He’s so perfect-so, so perfect. I love every single one of his qualities. I love that he is also mentally handicapped just like me (obviously mine isn’t nearly as severe as his), his attachment to his deceased mother, that he has a more submissive side triggered by reminders of his mother or traumatic drowning (careful not to wander into wooby territory!!), and has done some things that.. let’s just say, feed into my dark fictional fantasies and favorite tropes. Very violent man. I love human Jason with all of my heart! I’ve even been writing a huge fanfiction about him and my self insert; a very dark, disturbing, and violent love. <3 I honestly love him much more than William.
That’s right. With some recent happenings, I'm starting to actually have some pretty low hopes for Vanessa and William-William much more so than Vanessa.
I haven't seen Five Nights at Freddy's 2 yet, but from what I know from a friend and otherwise, I don't know if I feel great about what's to come.
I already had kind of a bad feeling after seeing Vanessa and Mike on what appeared to be a date. One side of me doesn't want them to end up together, the other doesn't want her to end up in some weird shit horrible writing-or God forbid, both. I can’t stand the thought of them together. EW. I just have a sort of bad feeling for the time being. I guess I can try to keep high hopes that at least she isn't butchered.
William, however…
I have a bit of intuition as for what they want to do with him and it's not a great feeling. As you are probably aware, the actors of Scream's Billy and Stu play Henry Emily and William Afton. A lot of fans interpret Henry and William as gay (particularly in the books where William is mentioned to sometimes “worship” Henry) and, well, you already know the nature of the dynamic between Billy and Stu. I think it's pretty clear where they're probably going to take this, lol.
I really have nothing against gay men or fictional m/m gay pairings. It's just not my cup of tea. I like f/f or hetero. And I'm also just really not comfortable shipping with a character who is not into women.
Maybe he'll be bi or something, idk. But I'm just not that comfortable for the time being. I'm happy for the people who want this and I'm happy that the two actors have this opportunity to work together, but it just isn't for me. If this is the route they're going to take, then I actually will end up dropping William. It hurts because I loved him so much as a child and now again for like the past two years, but I have been smelling this coming a mile away for a long time. It was almost instantly solidified the second they confirmed Skeet's role as Henry.
Just not my cup of tea. There's a very strong possibility that I will drop William, Vanessa, or both. I hope that, if anything, it will be only William. I've already been distancing myself from him for awhile yet I still really love Vanessa. I’m pretty desensitized to William at this point, as sad as it is to admit. God please let me keep Vanessa. I was with her before Mike (if he actually is) so idgaf. I just want to keep her so badly… I'm just in a weird spot right now.
For the time being, let's focus on Sidney and Jason! Woot woot.
Anyways, thank you so much for reading down to here if you have. It took a lot to get all of that out of my system. I'm trying to do my thing. I feel like I'd be a lot more bothered by this if they were still the only two characters I was in love with, but I'm just not that hurt, to be honest. I feel like an issue with Vanessa would actually be a lot more hurtful just because I've seen the William stuff coming for a very long time and sort of just expect it at this point.
Thanks again!!